Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs - that can knock you out!!

It's been dreary and overcast here in Pittsburgh the last few days and I'm not going to sugar coat it, it's just depressing after a point. But food is always a pick-me-up for both David and myself :D which is when David suggested we have meatballs for dinner. A nice comforting food that makes us feel happy and satisfied. However, you haven't seen these meatballs. May be it's just me, but I have a certain fear respect for a ball o' meat that's big enough to knock me out if someone took a fancy of lobbing one at me. Who would lob a meatball at my head you ask? Flint Lockwood? No, probably David - he is always itching to toss a snowball at me so I figure it's the same. I digress (but I will watch my back in the kitchen now...)

So, in order to prevent a terrible hailstorm of meatballs in the 'burg's vengeful gods, David and I set out to make these giants. I won't lie, I laugh everytime I make them because there just isn't a mixing bowl big enough for them (outside of a restaurant's kitchen. Or, either of our mothers lol), so a pot it is! After we mixed everything together the ridiculous perfect amount of mixings were then formed and placed in our huge roasting pan, except when filled with these monsters our pan looks tiny : / 

How big are they, you ask. I would say they are a Pittsburgh unit, give or take, and if you don't know how big that is - let me assure you it's an intimidating amount of meat to be presented in any sitting at the table. It. Is. Big. 

I tried to take pictures to give you scale, but I had few ideas and I was too lazy concerned about their structural integrity, so I opted not to remove them from the pan to show you properly. Don't judge me. I was tired haha. Thus, our matchstick idea David so brilliantly suggested.

Speaking of that, This free programming is made possible by Chey, who without her ingenious idea and gift of Crocs my feet wouldn't have been able to stand long enough to make these balls. *Applause* Brilliant! They really do make standing in the kitchen cooking that much more of a pleasant experience. And yes, I really did just include a random picture of my feet in this post :D

 

This was our beautiful end result after an hour of baking. 13 beauties baked to perfection and just begging to be eaten. So, just go find a horde of hungry teenage boys, or a small army, and enjoy the feast!

 

 

Meatballs - the size of a softball! Recipe

 

Makes: about 10-13 servings

Cook time: 1 hour to 1 hour 10 minutes

 

*As a warning, do NOT cook these in sauce, unless of course your goal is to make a tasty meat sauce. They are too delicate to get stirred in a sauce.

 

• 1 medium onion diced
• 5 c fresh bread crumbs (5 slices bread food processed to crumbliness)
• 2 c Parmesan cheese
• 1 c freshly chopped basil leaves, or substitute chopped arugula and 1/4 c dried basil
• 1 c fresh chopped parsley, or substitute in 1/4 c dried parsley
• 1 tsp crushed red pepper flakes
• 1 tbsp kosher or sea salt
• 1 tbsp fresh ground black pepper
• 4 eggs
• 1 c whole milk
• 4 tbsp EVOO
• 1 head garlic, cloves smashed and finely chopped
• 5 lbs ground beef, or substitute a 1:1 ratio of ground beef and pork
• 1 c warm water

1. In a large bowl, mix the bread  crumbs, cheese, basil, onion, eggs, milk, EVOO, garlic, meat, water, parsley, red pepper, salt and pepper. Mix well with your hands. The mixture should be loose, but able to maintain its form.
2. Preheat your oven to 350 degrees F.
3. Form the meatballs into balls between the size of a softball and a baseball (about 8-10 oz portions)
4. Place them into a pan at least 2" deep, our roasting pan was perfect, making sure they don't touch each other to ensure they evenly cook.
5. Bake until all the meatballs reach an internal temperature of 165 degrees F, about 1 hour to 1 hour and 10 minutes.
6. Transfer to a serving platter and serve hot or let cool, place in container and refrigerate, OR let cool and put into a freezer safe container and freeze for use within 6 months.